When to Skip the Microwave

Skip the microwave when the behavior is a one-off you have never seen before, when the person is visibly overwhelmed that day, or when the issue is about their identity rather than a specific action they chose.

Microwave feedback works on recurring, observable behaviors with clear impact — not on character, intent, or a whole quarter of frustration. For those, schedule a dedicated thirty minutes instead. Knowing which lane you are in is half the skill.