Watch for Mismatches

Develop these habits and the subtext will start revealing itself:

• Spot the gap between words and tone — "sure" said flatly is not agreement
• Notice what is not said — if someone avoids answering, that silence is a message
• Check follow-up actions — if they say "let's do lunch" but never suggest a date, it was a pleasantry
• Learn cultural defaults — British indirectness, American enthusiasm, Australian understatement
• Ask when unsure — "Do you mean you'd like me to change it?" is always acceptable.