The Repair Script

Effective repair follows a pattern: acknowledge, take responsibility, reconnect. Start by naming what happened from their perspective: "That was really hard. I yelled, and that must have felt scary." Then own your part. Finally, reconnect: "I love you, even when we have tough moments."

Notice that apology is not weakness. It is modeling. When you apologize to your child, you teach them that strong people take responsibility. You teach them that love survives mistakes and that they are worthy of respect.