Empathy Is Learned

Many parents assume empathy unfolds on its own, like walking or talking. It does not. Children seem to come wired with some capacity to resonate with others' feelings, but scientists still debate the exact neural mechanisms behind that raw material.

There are two kinds, and your child needs both. Cognitive empathy is reading what someone thinks: noticing the slumped shoulders, guessing the worry. Affective empathy is actually feeling a flicker of it yourself. A child who only reads people without feeling for them can use that insight coldly.