The Desire for Recognition

Adler saw the desire for recognition as one of the greatest obstacles to freedom. When you live to be liked, you hand control of your life to others. Their moods become your prison, their opinions your compass.

The radical solution: separation of tasks. Ask yourself: whose task is it? Studying for a test is the student's task. Whether the teacher approves is the teacher's task. You can only control your side. Worrying about how others judge you is doing their task for them — and it will exhaust you.