Commands Trigger Resistance

"Clean your room." "Eat your vegetables." "Stop running." Direct commands collide with a child's autonomy drive — the deep need to feel in control. The more you command, the more they resist. This is not disobedience.

Cooperation phrases work because they invite rather than demand. They give the child a sense of agency while still moving toward your goal. The child feels like a participant, not a subordinate. And a child who feels like a participant invests in the outcome.