Describe, Don't Judge

The fix is process praise: say out loud exactly what the child did. "You used three different colors in that drawing" lands harder than "Beautiful!" because it points to a real choice they made. "You kept trying even when the puzzle was hard" beats "You're so smart" because it credits the effort, which they can do again.

The recipe is short: name the behavior, the effort, or the strategy. "You shared your snack even though you wanted all of it — that took generosity." You are handing the child the words to one day judge themselves, instead of waiting for you to do it.